Comments (6)

By Mom Unplugged, November 21, 2007 10:28 pm

This is all an alien concept to me, “Slacker Holiday Mom.” So I asked my very organized and holiday-loving bloggy friend Heather of Celtic Mommy to help out with ideas for organizing (thank you Heather!!!). All you “Holiday Prep-Loving Type 2′s” out there might need some hints for how to get it all done in time to enjoy yourselves, so hopefully Heather has some good ideas for you here (plus, she put in lots of great links):

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Heather says:

“Before I had children… before I got married… before I moved out of my mom’s house… I was a holiday organizer. I have always been an organizer. I think part of the reason may be that my mom is completely UNorganized. Yep, she cannot tell you where the wrapping paper is… where the scotch tape is, where a pen is! But she knows where her heart is, and that was all that really mattered.

Even though my mom’s way was successful for her, I still did things my own way (made lists, made a budget, shopped early, sent cards early, etc.) and that worked for me.

These tips work for me. Some may or may not work for you. It all depends on each individual’s personality… so take each tip with a grain of salt. Also, all the links I use are included.

Why Organize? ( FlyLady’s Cruising through the Holidays and Organized Christmas)
I organize for selfish reasons. I want things done early so I can enjoy the holiday season, period! Sure, I’ve had frazzled years where I am up until 4 a.m. wrapping gifts… and I never want to do that again! Do you like being up until the crack of dawn knowing something you just lovingly wrapped is about to be torn open… my guess would be no. AND, by getting organized, you make time for yourself and your family and for those other things that matter:

Stringing popcorn for the tree. Playing the dreidel game. Taking walks as a family. Baking together. Visiting with neighbors, family and friends. Hot cocoa and s’mores by the fire or under the stars. Watching the mail for holiday cards and reading them with your family each evening. Making your own wrapping paper. Green alternative to wrapping paper. Touring local houses strung with lights . Snowball fights, snowman making and sled riding…

Sound inviting? Here’s how I do it. Again, take what you can from this for this year and add a little on next year and the next… find ways to make the holidays a fun time, not chore time.

Calendar: Right now (End of November)

If you send out cards, start getting them ready now if you haven’t already. Buy stamps online or when you are at the grocery store rather than brave the post office lines.

Write down your family’s measurements (shirts, pants, shoes, etc.) and keep in the same place as your shopping lists. Now is also a great time to go through old clothes and toys and donate to charity. This works on several levels such as teaching charity to children.

Make a shopping list! Not just for people but for all holiday items including postage and cards, tree budget, food budget (if baking gifts or having dinners), travel budget if applicable.

I do mine in Excel for easy keeping and then take a printout with me when shopping. This way I know what I’ve already bought and what I still need to do. On my list, I have:

+ Gift recipients’ name
+ Things they like (colors, games, books, movies, food)
+ Ideas I’ve written down throughout the year (If something was mentioned in July, I added it to my spreadsheet)
+ If making homemade gifts, what needs to be purchased (i.e. yarn, fabric, paint)
+ Money budgeted
+ What has been bought already
+ Money spent already
+ Homemade items completed (YES/NO)
+ Shopping completed (YES/NO)
+ Items wrapped (YES/NO)
+ I also have past years gifts listed so I know what I bought.

Every time I go to the grocery store, I grab an item or two that I will need for my big baking weekend (an extra pound of butter, a jar of a spice I will need) so that it doesn’t bust my budget.

If I am out at the bookstore or my local mall for some reason, I check my list to see if I can pick up anything on my list. Otherwise, I try to buy online as much as I can. Most places give free shipping for a standard small fee and I can track everything from home. And, items are almost always in stock right now!

When I get home, I put on holiday music and some holiday socks, make a fresh pot of mint tea or hot cocoa and I wrap a few gifts (about ½ hour to an hour). If I can’t do it right when I get home, I do it in the morning when the babies are asleep or in the evening while something is in the oven… or when the hubby is watching the kids in the bathtub. The point is to do a little each day so that you are not overwhelmed come mid-December.

I get out the boxes of decorations and check for broken items or if anything needs to be replaced and take care of that now. Also, we have many many craft projects in this house. So, I organize things like felt, glitter, glue, markers, paint, etc. that we’ll be using in the next few weeks. (More on projects later)

I take 1 to 2 hours (sometimes more, sometimes less) each day to work on the homemade items I am giving this year. For me, the handmade gifts are a way of customizing with love, a little something for each person. And, a little money goes a long way when you make it yourself!

That’s it for now… the main point of all of this is to do a little each day! This thousand mile journey begins with one step… and by getting a little more done each day, you will have time for those things listed above. Or, if you don’t feel like stringing popcorn and it’s too hot to make a snowman, tell us what holiday tradition you would like to do this year.

Heather
Celtic Mommy”

Read all the Christmas/Holidays Unplugged posts by clicking here.

Thanks to morguefile.com and photographer gracey for this photo.

Comments (9)

By Mom Unplugged, November 20, 2007 8:17 pm

If this photo depicts the extent of your holiday decorating ambitions, then please read on…

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The votes are in!

Am I, Mom Unplugged, a Type 1 “Holiday Slacker” or Type 2 “Holiday Overachiever?” Three of you think I am a Type 2 and two of you voted Type 1.

I am really extremely flattered that the majority of you think I am Type 2…but the real answer? I am so NOT a Type 2!!

I am the biggest Type 1 Holiday Slacker around. That old wreath and dusty artificial tree example? That is me. Except I actually put up TWO wreaths every year thank you very much! (Actually it is only because I have to since I have a double front door.)

So today’s post is for any other slacker-types out there.

If you are a Holiday Slacker and you are comfortable with your level of activity (or lack thereof), then that is great and perhaps you should be writing this post instead of me!

However, most of us who really do dislike all the Holiday fuss and preparation feel somewhat compelled to put on a brave face and make an effort anyhow, sometimes making ourselves miserable in the process.

So how can we change our lot and either manage to happily do more than we would like to, or come to terms with the fact that we are not going to do much? I don’t really know the answer to that, but I can put forth some suggestions. If you have any others, please feel free to leave them in the comments.

My best advice is to think about why you feel compelled to bake, decorate, and generally overachieve despite not really wanting to:

1) Is it because you think your family expects it?

Why not talk to your family and/or spouse about what they want out of Christmas. You may think they want the Perfect Holiday House, but perhaps all they really want is a Perfectly Happy Holiday You. If you are silently hating every minute that you spend accomplishing your required holiday tasks (or tasks that YOU perceive to be required), how positive and joyful can you really be with your family?

If your family does indeed want more than just an artificial tree and dusty old wreath, then have them help too. Why should you be the one to do it all? Christmas is a family time and even if your spouse would rather watch football and your teens would rather hang out with their friends, make them the deal that decorating and baking will occur only with their help.

If it is really that important to them, then they’ll probably be willing to join in. Once they do, they will probably even enjoy it (although those teens might be too cool to admit that to you). You will almost certainly enjoy it more too if you no longer feel that you are shouldering the holiday burden alone. You might even have fun!

2) You want to create a “magical Christmas” for your children?

There is a good chapter in Unplug the Christmas Machine: A Complete Guide to Putting Love and Joy Back into the Season entitled “The Four Things Children Really Want for Christmas” (read my post about this great book here). I’ll let you read the book for all the details, but basically kids want family time for Christmas. If you are rushing about madly trying to “do it all,” then you probably aren’t going to have time / energy or be much in the mood for family time with the kids.

It is the simple memories that stick with kids. Think back to your own childhood holidays. Hopefully you can dig up at least a few happy memories. What are they? Do you remember exactly what presents you got or how well the house was decorated? Probably not.

You might remember going with your Dad to cut a tree, or baking cookies with your Mom, or sitting in your pajamas on a parent’s lap and reading The Night Before Christmas. Or maybe one year you all got snowed in and played board games while eating peanut butter sandwiches. Or perhaps one year you had a “camp out ” in the living room under the Christmas tree.

Don’t get sucked into Hallmark’s vision of a “magical Christmas.” In reality, a “magical Christmas” for children doesn’t require much apart from some time and attention from Mom and Dad.

3) You read women’s magazines or watch Martha Stewart and feel that commercial and social pressure to do it all?

Think realistically. Do you know how many months of work of full-time artists and professional designers it must take to create those magazine “perfect Holiday” decors? Neither do I, but I suspect that it is a ton. If you LIKE to do that stuff then please, by all means do it and have fun. But if you have read this far in my post, you are probably like me and do not enjoy it. So don’t bother. You’ll never be able to achieve that result and you’ll only make yourself (and your family) miserable trying. Enough said.

(And next year, please simply take those December issues out of the mailbox and put them straight into the recycle bin!)

4) Was / is your mother a Holiday overachiever or underachiever?

My mother didn’t much care for Christmas prep either and I guess I am following happily in her footsteps. So for those of you who have Holiday overachieving mothers, I can see that you might feel compelled (either consciously or not) to live up to her seemingly impossible standard.

If your mother was a Holiday underachiever and you desperately wish to be different from your mother, then perhaps that is the source of your drive to “do it all” even though deep down inside, it is not really what you want to do.

My guest blogger for tomorrow’s post, a Type 2 writing about Type 2 organizational issues, begins her post by attributing her stellar organizational abilities to her mother’s lack of organization! Whether we like it or not, mothers influence us in many unforeseen and complicated ways.

I will not attempt any deep psychoanalysis here, but by acknowledging that our urge to unwillingly overdo it as stemming from a feeling of “needing” to be like or not like our mothers, perhaps that is the first step towards accepting that we should just be who we are and do what we really want or don’t want and get off the Holiday Hamster Wheel!

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Next post: for the Type 2 Holiday Achievers out there who actually LIKE doing this stuff - tips on how to sequence and organize all that wonderful Holiday prep so you can really “do it all” and still enjoy yourself. The post will be written by a Master Holiday Organizer (hint…it is not me).

Read all the Christmas/Holidays Unplugged posts by clicking here.

Thank you to morguefile.com and photographer messa for this sweet photo of Diego.

Comments (11)

By Mom Unplugged, November 17, 2007 10:18 pm

It seems to me with regards to Holiday prep, that there are two types of people:

1) Type 1 dislikes all the pressure to decorate, bake, and generally make everything “perfect.” Some of these people are OK with that and accept the fact that their only Christmas decorations might be a wreath and a dusty old artificial tree pulled down from the attic…or perhaps nothing at all. However I suspect that many of these reluctant types often begrudgingly try to keep up anyhow, succumbing to guilt…or family, social and commercial pressure to “create the perfect holiday.” While this might lead to the appearance of a “nice” Christmas for everyone else in the family, it leaves Mom feeling grouchy and tired (and yes, it is usually Mom not Dad who undertakes the Holiday prep).

2) Type 2 genuinely loves to “do it all.” These people decorate their home inside and out, bake cookies, pies, cakes, gingerbread houses etc. etc. They might shop for months for the perfect gift, or perhaps craft most of their holiday gifts by hand. Although they enjoy the whole “Holiday Process,” Type 2 also often has a big problem: how to accomplish all that they want to accomplish and still have time to enjoy the Holiday themselves.

So where am I going with this? My next Christmas/Holidays Unplugged post will offer helpful (I hope!) hints for dealing with the issues faced by my “type.” The following post will be by a guest blogger of the other school of thought, offering suggestions and hints geared towards those particular problems.

OK readers, how well do you know Mom Unplugged? Am I a “Type 1″ or “Type 2?”

Photo courtesy of morguefile.com and photographer Jared Tolla.

Comments (13)

By Mom Unplugged, November 16, 2007 1:55 pm

No, not a list for Santa, not a gift list, or even a “to-do” list. If you really want to unplug your holidays then why not start by making a list of what your particular holiday means to you, or at least what you would like it to mean.

Only once you figure out what you want your holiday to be, can you then take steps to make that vision a reality.

For example, Christmas to some people has a deeply religious meaning. To others it is a time to gather with family. For others, it may be a time to think more about helping people and making our world a better place. Perhaps your “ideal Christmas” is a combination of several of these themes.

I can pretty much guarantee that no one is going to put on their list:

• “Christmas is a time to spend a lot of money at Walmart buying gifts of cheap plastic toys and nose hair trimmers.”

• “What I like most about Christmas is running around like a crazy person trying to create the perfectly decorated house like in Better Homes and Gardens December issue.”

• “My favorite Christmas pastime is spending hours writing hundreds Christmas cards to send to every friend, family member and business acquaintance I have ever known in my life, all while worrying that I might forget someone who will send ME a card and thus make me feel bad for not having sent them one.”

So, write your holiday list and see if your usual holiday matches what you want to be celebrating. If not, then perhaps it is time to make a few changes.

Read all the Christmas/Holidays Unplugged posts by clicking here.

Photo courtesy of morguefile.com and photographer ronnieb.

Comments (7)

By Mom Unplugged, November 12, 2007 10:08 pm

Last week I announced a new series of posts entitled “Christmas Unplugged.” Actually any major holiday can be inserted in place of “Christmas,” but I think it will be easier for me to just focus on one holiday and allow you to generalize.

For several years now, I have really been trying to figure out how to simplify Christmas. Christmas just seems so over-the-top sometimes. Even without TV I am irked by the commercialism and the messages of spending money as the only path to “The Perfect Christmas.” I don’t like all the massive exchanges of gifts that often are unwanted or unneeded.

Before children, I could ignore my discomfort. After all, it is just one day a year. But ever since I have had children, I have felt the need to focus my thoughts much more on how and why we celebrate Christmas.

I think I will write more on this topic next time for it is the starting point of any transformation of Holiday traditions. Today, I want to begin this series by introducing a very interesting book that has helped me think more about my “issues” with Christmas and what to do about them.

When I first announced my Christmas Unplugged series last week, several of you commented that I should read Unplug the Christmas Machine. Well, I already had (or nearly had, I think I still had one or two chapters to go), in fact it was one of my inspirations for writing this series.

I accidentally found Unplug the Christmas Machine: A Complete Guide to Putting Love and Joy Back into the Season on Amazon a while ago. I wish I could remember how. I put it in my “Wish List” for future reference and finally bought it back at the end of September, as my thoughts turned to yet another round of holiday confusion.

I have really enjoyed this book, and have found it very useful for helping to sort out my thoughts. I guess I am not alone in feeling empty and miffed at the holidays.

Unplug the Christmas Machine covers all the bases. Whether you are an exhausted overachiever, a guilty underachiever, have annual family conflicts to deal with, hate the commercialism, want more spirituality in your Christmas, male, female, with children, childless, etc. etc. etc. I think you will find some helpful thoughts and ideas in this book.

I always like reading chapter titles when I consider a book, so if you like that too, then here they are:

Intro: The Christmas Pledge
1) “A Christmas Carol” Revisited
2) Women: The Christmas Magicians
3) Men: The Christmas Stagehands
4) The Four Things Children Really Want for Christmas
5) The Homecoming
6) Inside the Christmas Machine
7) The Gift of Joy
8) A Simple Christmas
9) Christmas Revival
Appendix: Resources for a Simple Christmas

Each chapter ends with exercises for helping you determine your feelings about the particular subject of the chapter. There is also always a question and answer section that often contains concrete ideas and helpful resources.

The Appendix is a book unto itself and is packed full of ideas and resources that the authors have found useful for helping to simplify Christmas. The subjects covered are:

-Decorations, broken down by category (Greens, Tree, Candles, etc.)

-Music

-Christmas Cards

-Entertaining

-Food (includes recipes)

-Gifts, includes great “alternative gift ideas” and “easy homemade gifts” (as far as I’m concerned, this book is worth buying just for this “Gifts” section alone!)

-Alternative Christmas Activities for Churches

-Making a Christmas Budget

If you feel really energized by the message of this book, you can help enlighten others by buying a Leader’s Guide ($20) and hosting your own “Unplug the Christmas Machine” workshop.

I could go on and on about all the useful, concrete information and encouragement that is in this book. But the main point of my post has to be that if you have any doubts at all about Christmas, try reading Unplug the Christmas Machine: A Complete Guide to Putting Love and Joy Back into the Season to see if you find some inspiration.

You could get it from the library or go all out and buy it. I decided just to buy it and am glad I did, since I view it as a reference book to be pulled off the shelf whenever I need a bit of encouragement or a useful idea.

One thought on buying it: new at Amazon it is currently $10.36 (paperback). I purchased a “Like New” copy from an “Amazon Seller” for about $5.00 (including shipping) and honestly I couldn’t tell that it was not a brand new book! So if you want to buy it, shop around.