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By Mom Unplugged, October 18, 2008 9:13 am

Many times when people find out that we have no TV they look at me as if I am from another planet. I suppose to them, it is as if I am saying that we have no indoor plumbing, or running water. TV has become as much a part of our lives nowadays as central heat and a flush toilet. Most people take TV for granted and view it as one of life’s necessities.

However, just because I have no TV does not mean that I am a luddite. Obviously I love my computer and my high-speed internet access (perhaps too much). Technology can be a wonderful thing, but like many wonderful things, I believe that it is best used in moderation.

Deciding to adopt an unplugged lifestyle is a matter of degree. The one extreme would be no TV, videos, computer…nothing with a screen…EVER. The other end of the unplugged spectrum is to allow the use of all those things, but in moderation.

For those of us who do wish to live some form of screen-free life, the degree to which we do so is very much a matter of personal choice. What works for one individual or family, might not work for another.

My family is somewhere in the middle. Although we are without a TV signal here in this remote part of Arizona (having chosen not to install cable or satellite), we do own “the box” which I inherited from my mother. I allow occasional videos or DVDs. I also allow some limited computer time for the two oldest who like to play educational games. We have no TV-based video games and I even try to avoid loud talking, flashing toys. I prefer quiet ones that offer more open-ended, imaginative play.

When we are away from home and someplace with a TV, I allow the kids to watch some. They find this totally fascinating and consider it a big treat. What’s more, they’ll watch ANYTHING and are just as happy watching the Food Network as they are PBS Kids.

So for anyone who has been lurking here because you are considering reducing or eliminating screens from your family’s life, I hope you feel encouraged by this post. It never occurs to many people that it is all simply a matter of degree!

You don’t have to cut it all off. You don’t have to do it cold turkey. You don’t have to rip out your plumbing and build an outhouse.

My advice: Don’t be afraid to experiment. Adjust your screen time until you find just the right balance for you and your children.

Comments (2)

By Mom Unplugged, September 21, 2008 8:05 am

The children are playing nicely (for the moment) downstairs while I enjoy a peaceful, early morning cup of tea in bed - a weekend ritual for me. It is a gorgeous fall Sunday here in the mountains. The sky is that same unreal blue color as in my new header image, the air is smooth and cool and the leaves are just starting to take on a slight hint of color.

Homework is happily behind us and the day stretches on ahead, ripe with possibilities: a walk, a board game, a few chapters of a book. Today I am determined to make this a day spent with my children. Something I don’t do often enough.

I recently found these inspiring thoughts on the Screentime.org blog. If you occasionally need a little reminder to live life and forget the laundry (as I know I sometimes do) then read this thoughtful post and see if it helps.

(Many thanks to Wishy’s Husband for this lovely photo! This photo is NOT retouched. The sky really is that color here sometimes!)

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By Mom Unplugged, September 3, 2008 9:09 pm

I am truly touched by all the wonderful responses to my last post! Honestly, I was a bit nervous when I hit the “publish” button for Blog Fears. It was a little more personal than I normally tend to get, but now I am SO glad that I wrote it.

It is very comforting to know that other mothers around the world share the same feelings that I do. And I am glad that you all realize where I am coming from too.

If anyone else out there has ever felt down about their blog, a nasty comment, or even simply a bad day at home with the kids, I encourage you to read the amazing comments that people left for my Blog Fears post.

Thanks to all of you, I am now feeling renewed, invigorated, and encouraged!

I’m sure I’ll still feel the sting when the next mean remark comes my way, but I’ll look back on all your comments and remind myself that there are far more wonderful people in the world than not.

Thank you all so much for lifting my spirits. YOU are the ones who inspire me!

Comments (42)

By Mom Unplugged, September 2, 2008 8:20 pm

CONFESSION: Sometimes I fear that my blog might make others feel inadequate.

I am NOT a Perfect Mom, far from it!!! In fact “Consistently Substandard” is my parenting philosophy (CSS=”Consistently Substandard Slacker”).

OK, forget the humor. Honestly though, a carefully written post every few days does not really completely equal my life and me. Does that make sense?

I have read discussions over the year and a half that I have been blogging and reading blogs, about how the rosy, “perfect” Mom-blogs of others make some feel inadequate by comparison.

I constantly worry about that. The purpose of my blog is to hopefully help, inspire, and connect.

• No we do not have TV in our house and I blog about that. By this I am not implying that I feel that this is the desired lifestyle for all. It is not. However for anyone who has inclinations in the TV-free direction, I hope to provide information, encouragement, and show that it IS possible (for some) to live happily without TV.

• Yes I try to do a craft project with my kids once a week. Am I “crafty?” No. Am I creative? Probably. I have always enjoyed art, music etc. but so far have found little time or energy to tackle much of that with my kids. The Unplugged Project is as much for me as for others. It makes me sit down once a week and do something fun and creative with my children.

• Much of my daily “real life” is spent following my two year-old dictator around, tidying up clutter (I have a dysfunctional love-hate relationship with stuff), and accomplishing such exciting tasks as laundry, scooping cat poop out of the litter boxes, and cleaning bathrooms. Glamorous? No. Real? Yes.

• I don’t homeschool. Although I love the idea of it and greatly admire those who succeed at it, I am not unhappy with the school my children attend. I also am quite delighted to see my kids return to school in the fall. See? I really am a devotee of CSS!

Unplug Your Kids seems to have become more well known recently. Apparently with “fame” comes criticism. Perhaps I liked it better when no one had heard of UPYK.

I have recently read a few negative, spiteful references to my blog. I have also had some equally negative, spiteful comments. (By the way, can you read this nasty commenters? “D-E-L-E-T-E B-U-T-T-O-N.” I have one and I use it, so don’t waste your time and mine with a needless, unpleasant remark.)

As a well-intentioned perfectionist and a relatively (I hope) nice person, I find this upsetting. I know I must make an effort not to take it all personally, but it is hard.

Good thing I am not a celebrity. If I had to read a bunch of awful things about myself in the National Enquirer in the grocery store checkout line, I’d just fade away and die. (Although if I were really a celebrity “worthy” of the front page of the National Enquirer, then I don’t suppose I would ever be in the grocery checkout line. Wouldn’t my “handlers” be there for me?)

I spend a lot of time and mental energy on this blog and I am thankful to have had mostly very positive comments and emails. I try to put more focus on those. They really mean so much!!

But for those of you who might feel inadequate or somehow threatened by my blog, here is THE TRUTH: I do not live in a state of blissful harmony with my offspring. Motherhood is certainly not all there is to me as a person. I adore my three children, but much of the time that I physically spend cooking, cleaning and following around my two year-old tyrant, I am actually mentally dreaming of flying; writing a book; having an intelligent, thought-provoking, adult conversation; traveling to Europe; making stained glass windows for my bedroom; or hanging out by the pool at a five star resort with adult friends drinking wine and tasting assorted fancy hors d’oeuvres.

This confession may disillusion some, and cause a few others to want to call Child Protective Services. Hopefully however, it will encourage most readers to see Unplug Your Kids not as a place of comparison, but a place of encouragement and companionship.

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By Mom Unplugged, August 22, 2008 9:09 am

After a long and complicated summer full of travel and adventures, school will begin again on Monday (hooray!!!).

Thanks to a little two week baby sitting coop that some friends and I did, I had some time this week without bored children around (as in NO children, ZERO children, NOT ONE CHILD!!!). I spent my time doing some badly needed decluttering of my house and now I feel that I have a fresh lease on life. Funny how something as simple as a few peaceful, child-free days and a bit of organization can lift the spirits so magically!

My next project will be to tackle the electronic clutter. My inbox currently contains 387 messages. A summer’s worth of undealt with email. I feel that I have been ignoring the blog for the last few months and I hope to be a bit more actively involved.

I have not replied to comments in a long, long time (I usually try to email a response) and for that, I apologize profusely. I appreciate each and every comment that is left, even if I don’t manage to answer. I hope to get back on track with that too so people know that there really is a live human being behind this blog!

I hope you all had super summers and can greet the fall with positive energy and joy.

(1743 Painting by James Seymour - Thomas Gage, First Viscount Gage and his horse. Photo courtesy of Wikimedia Commons)