Comments (15)

By Mom Unplugged, February 5, 2009 9:33 pm

I am depriving my children of an “essential good.”

In Brazil, I might be prosecuted in court. Did anyone hear this little NPR blurb yesterday?

A Brazilian man missed out on soccer matches, the news and a “popular reality show,” when a store did not replace his faulty TV. The judge found in favor of the man, ruling that in modern times, TV is an “essential good.”

Are those of us who do not have TV in our homes, guilty of child abuse? Are we depriving our little ones of an “essential good?”

What about those whose children (TV in the house or not) miss Sponge Bob, Hannah Montana and PBS. OK, Sponge Bob and Hannah Montana are arguable…but PBS? What about Discovery? Is censorship of our children depriving them of an “essential good?”

Am I depriving my children of educational/cultural experiences by not having TV at all?

I wish we could elect to get a few select Discovery Channel, National Geographic, PBS, History Channel shows without receiving all the other stuff. But even those channels can be edgy at times. We were away recently and the only thing on History (or was it Discovery?) was the history of torture devices. Another of those educational channels had a show about Hitler.

I am not depriving my children by having a TV-free home. Culturally they get a lot on the playground: they know about Sponge Bob and Hannah Montana. As far as education goes, my kids get a huge amount of that from school and reading books, just like kids did before TV.

Am I depriving my children of an “essential good?” Personally, I think not.

Comments (14)

By Mom Unplugged, December 22, 2008 8:51 pm

As a child, I remember Christmas being so exciting that I could hardly sleep the night before. We’d have a tree, Christmas stockings and yummy turkey. My Dad would always design a “trail” for me - a treasure hunt with clues - to lead me to my biggest present. Dessert was always my mother’s homemade Christmas pudding with lots of thick cream, almond paste cloaked Christmas cake, and tiny, flaky mince pies (my parents were from England).

As an adult, I managed to spend most of my Christmases at home with my mother and sister (my parents were divorced by then) where it would always be the same as I remembered (minus the trail).

This will be the fourth Christmas since the death of my mother. Each year, my sister and I have struggled with how to make Christmas like we remembered. For a variety of reasons, the first two years were fairly miserable. Last year, I just ran away from it all and ignored Christmas as much as I could.

This year, I feel brave enough to try it again. It will be different. My sister and I have decided that we can’t recreate the same thing without my mother. Those days are gone. I need to do something new (but with a few old elements?).

Those of you who have been reading this blog for a long time (at least a year) may remember last year’s Christmas/Holidays Unplugged series, so perhaps you know of my internal struggles. I want to create lovely memories and traditions for my children, but hate the commercialism and lack of any meaning.

I think that writing that series of posts really helped me prioritize and come up with a plan. A “year off” from Christmas helped a lot too.

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The plan this year is as follows:

- Tree: Thin tree that needed to be cut from our property anyway - read more: An Ugly Christmas Tree.

- Child Presents: Christmas stockings plus one gift each for the kids from Santa, and a few from us.

NOTE: Without TV, my kids don’t really have specifics on what they want…which is wonderful and difficult at the same time. They sat on Santa’s lap at our town Christmas tree lighting and both asked for “a surprise.” I wonder how many kids do that?

- Adult Presents: Christmas stockings all around. I do the children, my sister and my husband. My sister does her significant other and me. I love the challenge of finding cool little things that they might like that would fit in the tiny space of a stocking. It seems fun and not commercially excessive.

Otherwise, we are not doing adult gifts this year. We are all in the very fortunate position (especially fortunate in light of this year’s economy) of being able to buy whatever we need, and I hate shopping out of a “need to buy something” mentality.

In lieu of gifts, each adult will do a donation to charity for each other adult (to that other adult’s favorite charity). I have even gotten a few other relatives on board with this (even for the kids) which certainly lightens the gift receiving (and giving) burden, is much more in the spirit of the season, and makes me feel that we are actually doing good for the world rather than doing good for Walmart.

- Food: I think I’ll get a small, fresh turkey from our local market (but I’d better get on that right away, especially since the weather is forecast to be lousy). I’ll try to keep it somewhat simple because I want to enjoy the day and not spend it mostly in the kitchen as I remember my mother doing.

Of course, if I can’t get to the store for food, we’ll be having leftovers for Christmas. But snowed-in with leftover pasta might actually make for a completely fun and memorable Christmas!

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This is my overall plan. It may need refining next year…or maybe I’ll just want to run away again. I don’t know. I’ll tell you all how it goes.

Good luck defining (or redefining) your celebration. Happy holidays to all!

Comments (8)

By Mom Unplugged, October 18, 2008 9:13 am

Many times when people find out that we have no TV they look at me as if I am from another planet. I suppose to them, it is as if I am saying that we have no indoor plumbing, or running water. TV has become as much a part of our lives nowadays as central heat and a flush toilet. Most people take TV for granted and view it as one of life’s necessities.

However, just because I have no TV does not mean that I am a luddite. Obviously I love my computer and my high-speed internet access (perhaps too much). Technology can be a wonderful thing, but like many wonderful things, I believe that it is best used in moderation.

Deciding to adopt an unplugged lifestyle is a matter of degree. The one extreme would be no TV, videos, computer…nothing with a screen…EVER. The other end of the unplugged spectrum is to allow the use of all those things, but in moderation.

For those of us who do wish to live some form of screen-free life, the degree to which we do so is very much a matter of personal choice. What works for one individual or family, might not work for another.

My family is somewhere in the middle. Although we are without a TV signal here in this remote part of Arizona (having chosen not to install cable or satellite), we do own “the box” which I inherited from my mother. I allow occasional videos or DVDs. I also allow some limited computer time for the two oldest who like to play educational games. We have no TV-based video games and I even try to avoid loud talking, flashing toys. I prefer quiet ones that offer more open-ended, imaginative play.

When we are away from home and someplace with a TV, I allow the kids to watch some. They find this totally fascinating and consider it a big treat. What’s more, they’ll watch ANYTHING and are just as happy watching the Food Network as they are PBS Kids.

So for anyone who has been lurking here because you are considering reducing or eliminating screens from your family’s life, I hope you feel encouraged by this post. It never occurs to many people that it is all simply a matter of degree!

You don’t have to cut it all off. You don’t have to do it cold turkey. You don’t have to rip out your plumbing and build an outhouse.

My advice: Don’t be afraid to experiment. Adjust your screen time until you find just the right balance for you and your children.

Comments (2)

By Mom Unplugged, July 2, 2008 10:44 pm

I am officially procrastinating. Instead of packing for our big trip tomorrow (Phoenix by car, then East Coast by air on Friday) I am writing a Very Important Post about…well, hmm…beans?

Perhaps I’ll share a quick idea of what I came up with to help my 2 year-old be entertained during dinner preparation.

I have some wooden trays that some good French knives and serving utensils came in. I kept them because they were so nice, and also because I am a pack rat.

I have never really known what I would do with them, but tonight I brought out my big container of dried beans (that I keep exclusively for play purposes) and the wooden trays, and let my 2 year-old put the beans in the hollows in the trays.

She enjoyed it so much that my other two (6 and 7) arrived on the scene to see what was so fun. Much to my surprise, they asked if they could play too. So all three put beans in different shaped openings in the trays.

Maybe it is the Montessori “training” that makes them love this sort of thing (they have been attending since they were 3). But whatever it is, I was grateful for a bit of peace while I cooked.

Now, what else can I write about? Oh dear, I guess I must go and pack. I may be offline for a day or two while I am in-transit, but I will write when I can, and I will certainly be back for this week’s Unplugged Project (the theme is sky)!

Comments (10)

By Mom Unplugged, June 18, 2008 7:00 am

Anyone who has paid any attention at all to my children’s book recommendations might have noticed that illustrations are very important to me. In fact, I have an illustration prejudice. Most of the books I review are classified in the “exceptional illustrations” category because that is what I like. I confess that if a children’s book is well written but I find the illustrations unattractive, I usually think less of the book.

Because of this, we have some really lovely books that literally take my breath away every time I open them up. Just like a gorgeous man with a substandard IQ - who cares about literary quality when the pictures are that incredible to look at! (Just kidding of course…)

If you share my prejudice, then read on!

• Lovely illustration tip number one: Any fairy tale illustrated by K.Y. Craft or Paul O. Zelinsky will be spectacular in an ornate, Renaissance painting type of way (my personal weakness).

• Lovely illustration tip number two: Find a book you like the look of on Amazon, and then follow the “customers who bought this also bought” and “what do customers ultimately buy after viewing this item” links, or even the Listmanias in the sidebar, to discover other gorgeous books. How does Amazon “know?”

• Lovely illustration tip number three: Did I mention K.Y. Craft?

In my mind, fairy tales (classic and not so classic) MUST be sumptuously illustrated. If they are not, or worse - if they are “Disneyfied” (another prejudice on my part), then forget it.

Here are some that we have and enjoy. Be advised that I consider these books to be for older children (ages 5 and up?) because they are very “wordy.” However, you could share them with younger children if you paraphrase the text and just focus on the pictures.

Also, I don’t want to spend a lot of time analyzing the literary value, so not a lot of talk about the text this time. The point here is that the stories are fine, but the illustrations are superb:

Sleeping Beauty by K.Y. Craft is a rich feast for the eyes. The story is pretty much as I remember it from my childhood. The illustrations make it spectacular. To see more of the illustrations, please look at K.Y. Craft’s Sleeping Beauty page on his website.

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Cinderella by K.Y. Craft. Of course there are many versions of Cinderella around the world, but this is the one I remember from my childhood here in the US. By the way, I WANT Cinderella’s dress. Wouldn’t it look lovely on me as I browse the produce section at Safeway? K.Y. Craft’s Cinderella page.

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King Midas and the Golden Touch as told by by Charlotte Craft and illustrated by (you guessed it!), K.Y. Craft. Again, very traditional story which I like, and sumptuous illustrations. In this book I covet Aurelia’s (the daughter’s) hair. Glossy chestnut ringlets of course. Actually, I want all the hair from all of these K.Y. Craft fairy tales. How come no one has straight hair? I guess that’s why they call them “fairy tales” right? If they were real, they’d all have straight hair and bad skin. More King Midas illustrations.

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The Twelve Dancing Princesses as told by Marianna Mayer and illustrated by K.Y. Craft. This is a classic fairy tale that was unknown to me before discovering this book. Apart from the dresses and the ringlets, I like the messages of strong women and overcoming class barriers. Be sure to look at the illustrations on K.Y. Craft’s Twelve Dancing Princesses page. I think this is perhaps the best illustrated of all that I have mentioned so far.

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Rumpelstiltskin by Paul O. Zelinsky (adapted from The Brothers Grimm). Very true to what I remember, and illustrations “worth their weight in gold!” Visit Paul O. Zelinsky’s Rumpelstiltskin page to see more. A Caldecott Honor Book.

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Rapunzel by Paul O. Zelinsky. Lovely, Renaissance-like oil paintings. The classic Rapunzel tale. Boy, do I want HER hair! One potential word of warning for parents here though: there might be an awkward moment if you have to explain why Rapunzel’s dress grows “tight” around the waist after she marries the visiting prince in a secret ceremony in the tower. My kids didn’t notice a thing, but if you fear this is more detail than you want to get into, then be sure to borrow the book from the library first and read it yourself. Visit Paul O. Zelinsky’s Rapunzel page to see more art. A Caldecott Medal Winner.

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The Magic Nesting Doll by Jacqueline K. Ogburn and illustrated by Laurel Long. If I had to choose one of these books as my favorite for the illustrations it would have to be this one. There is a level of fine detail and delicateness to these illustrations beyond even what I see in the other books (and those are quite amazing). In an interesting feminist turn around of the normal fairy tale universe, the beautiful girl actually saves the handsome prince! Another plus: The characters have straight hair. No bad skin though. Unfortunately there is no website that I can find for further illustrations, but trust me, they are gorgeous.