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By Mom Unplugged, April 4, 2007 10:00 pm

Thirteen Ways You Know You Have No Life

1….You get really excited when you find magenta drier fluff in your drier’s filter instead of the usual grey variety.

2….You think it is fun watching the clothes get washed through the window of your front loading washer.

3….You have 8 cats, and enjoy writing about them.

4…You find it really thrilling to organize your kitchen junk drawer.

5…You take before and after photos of your kitchen junk drawer and publish them online (hmmm…maybe a post for me next week??)

6….You know which of your 8 cats produces which particular poop in your litter boxes (and you publish that online???).

7….You take pictures of your 4 year-old putting cheese goldfish crackers between his toes (the fact that your 4 year-old spends time doing this means that he has no life either…Aw! How cute! He takes after Mommy!!!).

8….You amuse yourself by making up “Separated At Birth” funnies with your animals (click here).

9….You have a very involved dream about scooping cat poop out of your litter boxes (the more you scoop, the more there is to scoop…Aaaghh!!!!)

10….The most exciting event of your week is finding a new color of mold on an old zucchini in your produce drawer (and you seriously consider publishing a photo online).

11…You write a Thursday Thirteen entitled “13 Ways You Know You Have No Life.”

12…You spend WAY too much time thinking about your blog.

13…In fact…you actually have a blog!

Comments (23)

By Mom Unplugged, March 21, 2007 8:10 pm

Thirteen Things I Never Dreamed I Would Ever Do

1. Discern a difference in performance between a “brand-name” disposable diaper, and a cheap “generic” diaper.

2. Bake my own bread without a machine…and enjoy it.

3. Pilot an airplane while nursing a baby.

4. Single-handedly care for three kids, six cats, one dog, and two birds.5. Maneuver an embarrassingly large SUV, toss a toy to the baby, put the favorite song on the CD player, distribute snacks, referee an argument over who called who “poopyhead,” and obey traffic rules - all at once.

6. Drink a glass of champagne that was older than I am.

7. Run around my backyard 10 minutes before my wedding scooping dog poop.

8. Become part of the “soccer-mom” demographic.

9. Get excited upon finding mysterious magenta-colored lint in the filter of my drier, instead of the usual grey variety. (Can you say “GET-A-LIFE?”).

10. Drive around town in a vehicle that should be condemned by the department of health.

11. Finish paying off my student loans.

12. Produce a perfect little miniature human being (actually three of them) from my own body.

13. Write a blog.